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Married for a decade. A mid-level professional, whom you would normally label as one leading the perfect life. But I am done fitting in with the stereotype of what society demands of women. Be a good wife. Be a great mother. A thorough professional who spends just the right amount of time in office so that you are not accused of compromising on your family life.
I decided to break out of the box life had put me in.
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At least in my personal life, where I was feeling the most letdown, where I was not an equal opportunity player. I had been reading about Gleeden , a dating app for married people. Like everyone else who has been married for long and swapped the sheen of romance for the disquiet of domesticity, I was terribly curious. I took the plunge. I created a fake account on Gleeden and logged in.
While a lot has been said about modern-day dating apps, where women often accuse men of only wanting to jump into bed with them, one of the first things I realised was that sex was not the only thing on offer.
It was just one of the things. They too were looking for amicable companionship. Sex was a byproduct, if things went beyond the confines of the app. The protocol was simple. If we connected and felt that the other was not a freak, we moved to another chat interface, outside the app. This is because a dating app, which invariably has more men than women, can be distracting for a woman user. You are bombarded with messages every mini-second. If a conversation is going well, you want to take it away from all that.
Just easy, breezy flirting, on an anonymous chat window. Mind you, not WhatsApp. That is considered the next level. Then I began to look forward to pillow talk.
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It is like the exhilarating rush of a first crush. Something that was completely absent in the customary two-minute conversations with my spouse about lunch, what the kid did in school, how we had to finish our pending errands over the weekend and other such exhilarating themes.
As I got hooked to the app, over a year, I met a total of eight, whom I call good men, in person, over drinks and dinner. This happened only after our comfort levels with each other had grown. At such meetings at a pub or a restaurant, our conversations veered towards morality, marriage and the mundane.
They told me of other women they had met through the app. Housewives, head honchos of corporate houses, entrepreneurs, marathon runners, et al. They were all using Gleeden.
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As I listened, the reality began to dawn on me. How a couple in a marriage — through years of love, conflict, comfort, raising children and wanting different things from life — begin to stop seeing each other. This, I realised, was normal and happened to everyone. Many refuse to acknowledge it because we are raised to believe in the happily ever after.
It was like looking at a mirror of sorts. What the men were complaining of their wives, maybe I was doing the same to my spouse? Maybe he was lonelier in our marriage but had found a different way to cope with it, by drowning himself in work?
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Eventually, I did get involved with someone, taking it beyond just dinner and drinks. I call him my FILF. I met the love of my life a year ago on this thing and we shared a year of love, passion, happiness and bliss. I will never regret meeting him and the happiness and joy we shared. Thank you" female member Please see our "About Us" page for many more real testimonials that we have received!
We are getting new testimonials all the time. If you're married, but looking, Married Secrets can help. Married Secrets is an online dating web site that caters to married people looking to recapture that feeling. We can connect you with other married couples or individuals in your area also seeking fun flirting, romantic married affairs, passionate encounters, or just a little affectionate companionship.
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Married Secrets is secure and provides you with that anonymity through our anonymous email contact system. Our password protected photos feature, ensures you determine who sees your photographs and who doesn't. We also have a new discreet married personals chat program featuring a rich chat window that allows members to contact other online dating web site members.
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